


My tongue is a weapon.

by Fairlyblvrry



Category: Bandom, Twenty One Pilots, Tyler Joseph - Fandom, josh dun - Fandom
Genre: Depression, Drug Abuse, I'm not good at tagging, Inspired by young god by Halsey, M/M, Suicide, Trigger warnings:, because she's amazing and I'm in love with her, idk - Freeform, kind of graphic depicitions of self induced drowning, pls read, slight physical abuse, stay safe friends, this is kinda depressing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-06
Updated: 2015-09-06
Packaged: 2018-04-19 07:04:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,441
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4737176
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fairlyblvrry/pseuds/Fairlyblvrry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>But do you feel like a young God?<br/>You know the two of us are just young gods, <br/>And we'll be flying through the streets with the people underneath,<br/>And they're running, running, running.</p>
<p>Inspired by Young God by my queen, Halsey.</p>
<p>TW:<br/>DRUG ABUSE<br/>SLIGHT PHYSICAL ABUSE<br/>DEPRESSION<br/>SUICIDE<br/>SLIGHTLY GRAPHIC DEPICTIONS OF SELF INDUCED DROWNING</p>
            </blockquote>





	My tongue is a weapon.

**Author's Note:**

> TW:  
> DRUG ABUSE  
> SLIGHT PHYSICAL ABUSE  
> DEPRESSION  
> SUICIDE  
> SLIGHTLY GRAPHIC DEPICTIONS OF SELF INDUCED DROWNING

Tyler watches Josh, his eyes full of curiosity and intent as the elder drawers his cigarette to his lips.

'What you thinking, baby doll?' Josh asks, eyes flicking from the view outside to look at Tyler,

'Don't really know.' Tyler sighs, getting up off their shared bed and walking over to Josh, who is sat on the windowsill, Tyler climbs onto his boyfriends lap and rests his head on the elders chest, sighing deeply.

'Talk to me, baby boy.' Josh whispers, rubbing the youngers back soothingly,

'I could jump, Joshua. I could fall out this window _right_ now. Would they let me into heaven if I killed _myself_? If I rid _myself_ of sin, will they let me into the holy land, Josh?' Tyler sighs, peering out of the open window, his eyes scanning over the night sky, Josh reaches out wearily and grabs the handle, pulling the window closer, not shut, but not wide open like it was before, he flicks his cigarette out of the gap, watching the embers fly off into the darkness.

'What are you on about, babe? Me and you, we're gonna be legends.' He whispers,

'Yeah, I know, _I know_ , you're the king, I'm the queen. We're too good for heaven. They don't _need_ us.' Tyler sighs, repeating Josh's words.   
Tyler was always the good little Christian boy, until he met Josh. Josh took his away innocence. Along with his sadness. But Tyler was always _scared_. Scared he wouldn't get into heaven because of his sins.

'Baby boy, I know you wanna go to heaven, I know. But you're human tonight. Don't worry about it. You're not an angel yet.' Josh whispers,

'I know. But it could end right now. I could drown my thoughts. Make the _noise_ go away.' Josh mumbles,

'You don't want that. You're a god. We are gods, Tyler. We don't need heaven, we have it right here.'

 

'This isn't heaven, Joshua.'

'Feels like heaven to me. I've got my boy, my smokes, my pills. Feels pretty great.' Josh chuckles, pushing himself off the windowsill, cradling Tyler in his arms as he carries the younger over to their bed, 

'That's not heaven, that's hell.' Tyler whispers as Josh lays him down carefully, 

'Then hell is where I want to be.' Josh smirks, straddling Tyler's waist, 

'What about me? I don't want to be dragged down with you.' 

'Nah, baby. You're in heaven. A perfect christian boy. You've got the good life, you've got the looks, you've got the money, you've got the brains, you've got the talent, you've got the _boy_ , you're set to go.' Josh smirks, stroking Tyler's cheek,

'Doesn't feel like heaven.'

'That's because I haven't taken your clothes off yet.' Josh laughs before he starts to undress his boyfriend, 'Gonna make you feel like an angel.'

 

 

\-- 

 

 

A year later, Tyler still hasn't found heaven. He is no god.

Tyler's eyes are blown wide as Josh storms towards him, 'Don't you dare talk back to me! Don't you see it, Tyler?! You need me! I'm the king of everything! I control you!' Josh yells, backing Tyler up against the wall, slapping his sharply across the face,

'Your words are _venom_ , Josh! What is wrong with you?! Get away from me!' Tyler shouts,

'Oh, Tyler baby, didn't you know? My tongue is my _weapon_.' Josh sneers, leaning forward kissing the youngers neck roughly, his hands grabbing viciously at the youngers hips, adding to the bruises,

'Are you high? Forget I asked. When are you not?' Tyler whispers, fear in his voice,

'Shut up.' Josh mutters, grinding his hips against Tyler's forcefully,

'Josh, please, you're scaring me.'

'Baby boy, you wanna go to heaven, don't you? If you wanna go to heaven, you should fuck me tonight.' Josh smirks, kissing his way up Tyler's neck and along his jaw.

'I don't want this, Josh. I don't want you to be like this anymore. You were fricking high off LSD yesterday, now what are you on? I can't have sex with you like this, Joshua.' Tyler sobs, trying to push the elder away,

'It's just amphetamines, baby.' Josh whispers, kissing Tyler sweetly, a complete juxtaposition to his current state.   
He was in love with Tyler. Nothing could change that.

 

Tyler was a god to him.

'Please don't do this. I want to go to bed. I don't want to go to heaven anymore, Josh. Not anymore.' Tyler whimpers, clutching Josh's shoulders as the elder grinds against him,

'We're gods, Tyler. We're young gods. Why can't you see that!?' Josh exclaims, gasping when Tyler pushes him away,

'I need air.' The young squeaks and rushes to the window, opening it as wide as it goes and clutching the frame as he leans out.

'Tyler... Tyler, what are you doing?' Josh asks wearily, suddenly become more sober as he begins stepping towards Tyler slowly, the younger sighs and turns to look over his shoulder at Josh,

'If I'm a god, Joshua, this won't hurt me. Death will only make me stronger. It will give me  _power_.'

'Tyler, stop this. We are gods, Ty, but we have to be gods _together_.' Josh whispers, approaching Tyler carefully,

'Then join me. We'll be flying through the streets and the people underneath will just be running. Running from us. We are in _control_ , Josh. We are young gods.' Tyler says as he kneels on the windowsill, looking out at the streets below him.

'Tyler, get down.' Josh snaps,

'I haven't told you a lot recently. It's back. The depression, I mean. It's worse. I don't want to be here anymore. I don't want to be a legend. I don't want to be a god. I don't want to sin anymore. I want to be _dead_. I can't deal with all this. I can't deal with us. I can't deal with you, Josh. The drugs, the abuse, I can't take it.' Tyler says, sobs racking his body as he leans out of the large window, Josh lunges forward and yanks his boyfriend back, cradling the younger against his chest,

'You can't do this to me, Ty! You can't just do this shit!' He yells, slamming the window shut as he holds Tyler tightly,

'I'm sorry.'

'No! You're crazy! This is crazy!' Josh shouts, pushing Tyler down on the bed roughly, 

'Maybe I am, but you're no better.' The younger mutters, quickly moving backwards, up the bed until his back is pressed against the headboard, he slowly curls his arms around his legs, hugging them tight to his chest, 

'Well then we are crazy together.' Josh whispers, crawling across the bed and kneeling in front of Tyler before leaning down and kissing his passionately. 'I love you. You are my god. My heaven.' 

'I love you too. But let me go, now. I'm gonna go get a bath.'

'Okay, you want company?'

'Not tonight, baby.'

 

 

\--

 

 

Tyler stares up at the ceiling, his eyes blurred with tears as his body slowly goes numb in the heat of the bathwater. 

It's just reached his neck. And is only getting higher. 

Tyler is going to heaven tonight. 

The water is rising.

It's  _burning_.

Tyler is surrounded by water.

He is surrounded by what his mind had turned into thick, black water. Poison. It's poison.

He is covered with an incredible pressure that was tight on his lungs. They are screaming for air.

As his lungs are squeezed impossibly tighter by the pressure, he chokes and gags on nothing but poison. His throat burns with trapped oxygen and his ears begin pounding.

His heart is beating against his chest, begging to be released, and all he can hear is the flow of the liquid that is surrounding him.

 

His soul longs to be in heaven.

He couldn't take anymore.

As he opens his mouth to scream, all that comes out is a rush of bubbles, rising to the surface and he realises that there is no going back.

He no longer knows what this is all for, he doesn't know how to find himself. 

He's fighting for death when he should be searching for survival.

And suddenly he felt the rush of water flowing through to the back of his throat and nose. He's relieved, but not for long. 

He can no longer hear the flow of the water, but instead the insistent banging and screaming from outside the bathroom door.

Josh knows.

Slowly Tyler's sight and consciousness start to slip away as he is enveloped by what he wanted all along. 

Heaven.

_And I've been sitting at the bottom of a swimming pool,_   
_for a while now, drowning my thoughts out, the sounds..._

 


End file.
